It's amazing how many people will talk shit about you when they think your not around or you wont find out. It's also amazing how defensive they get when they think you found out they have been talking shit about you which just proves they have been talking shit about you then try to avoid you after they realize you hadn't found out until they got defensive. When I have a problem with a person I will confront them about it and if I do talk to someone else about someone defending that person I'm talking about the whole time then the person I talk to twists it to make it sound like I was talking shit and thinks I won't find out is sadly mistaken because I always find out and will know not to trust that person since I will then know they will lie.

I have a serious pet pev about lying so if I catch someone lying to me or about me I do get offended because I won't lie to them or about them no matter what other people may say. People lying to me or about me is why I now have a horrible credit score, I'm now unemployed, practically no friends so I have no one to even hang out with, still haven't had a relationship, and can't even trust my family.

It's also strange how people who have never taken the time to meet me in person and find out what kind of person I really am can judge me so harshly, the people who have taken the time to get to meet me and get to know me in person find out that what they thought about me before that is totally wrong. Some times what people online think of me as someone that creeps them out or scares them, but in person they find out I'm not creep or scary but its just that the fact they haven't found out enough about who I am from behind a screen that really makes it seem like that. I am actually a nice, caring guy that sometimes feels awkward and won't know how to show that online but after meeting me can see what I was trying to say or do online. It is sad though the people who met me in person first then started talking to me online because of how hard it will be to see eachother in person will take advantage of that to take advantage of the kind of person I am for as long as they feel they can get away with it before I will find out.

It is because of the people that lie, the people who don't take the time to meet and get to know me, and the people who take advantage of me I end up feeling lonely even in the middle of a huge crowd and keeps me from being about to find a relationship since I need to know if I can trust the person before I can get into a relationship with them..

Since I know no one is even going to care enough to read what I post on here I guess the only point for posting on here is to be able to release without the fear of having somone using it to attack me since I don't promote people to come read my posts the people that would use what I post to attack me will never read what is posted here.